THE MUSINGS AND MEANDERINGS OF A HOT MESS MAGICAL CREATURE
Yes, that’s the title I originally gave my blog. And yes, it still applies to my writings.
I thought I would revisit this title as I haven’t mentioned it since my first post way back in … hmmm, when was that exactly. Seems like alternately yesterday and a life time ago.
I do muse within these paragraphs but what I find myself writing more of is meanderings. I start with a thought, a bubble of an idea, and really get going when suddenly, through no thought out process, I veer. I roam away from the central idea onto a new path that was only discovered by a phrase, memory or word of the past idea. It’s like a cat’s cradle of my mind…made out of that string that is too short to use. (See one of my previous blogs).
In one sentence I’m making a point and the next I’ve traveled down another lane entirely. That’s when the piece gets hijacked into another thread altogether. Sometimes this works, sometimes I am left holding a bag with holes in it. There are times, though, when I keep it all together and can tell a story.
As the writer I know I’ve strayed with no idea how to get back. But I sometimes wonder about the reader. Do you all think I’m mad, raving bonkers; or maybe I have the early stages of dementia or adult ADD. Or do you consider the Hot Mess of the title really does apply, in all it’s messiness.
Consider this, have you ever gone down a grocery aisle searching for that item, oh, say, a can of soup, on your well thought out list only to find yourself instead looking at the Maraschino cherries? That’s how my brain works. It jumps from one thing to another in rapid succession. Plus I love Maraschino cherries. I’ve trained myself to light on one subject for long periods of time but I really have to concentrate. While I’m writing I just let my mind flow like dandelions in the wind.
I write every day but only half of it gets published. The other half are pieces of thoughts. Sometimes when I go back to finish these ramblings I can’t figure out where I was going. I feel like I’ve never broached this subject before and how in the world did it get in my blog folder.
I take a certain amount of joy out of this scattered process. In the healthcare profession one should be orderly, sane and consistent. It makes life easier. But, alone with my little keyboard, I get to soar with no flight plan. It’s wonderful, it’s nerve racking, it’s fun. I love this process, my own little mess of a world. I love that I can share it with my peeps. I love that perhaps my mind is supposed to be like this. I love that my mind works at all. (The husband loves it too, but in an exasperated way. Sometimes he looks at me and asks, “Where are you going with this?” And I can honestly say, “I don’t know.”)
As we all near the season of Thanksgiving I think about what I’m thankful for. Besides the obvious, faith, friends, loved ones …I’m grateful my mind still can come around to the point; I’m happy that my fingers can still fly over the keys; I sing the Lord’s praises that I am that magical mess of a creature that writes to you all.
I’m grateful for all of it, the hot mess, the magic and yes, and the disorder. So, today or tomorrow or next week, take time to be grateful, not just for the usual cast of characters on everybody’s list, but for the unique, totally “you” things that make up your existence.
And yes, I realize I just jumped from a blog about chaos to thanksgiving. There you have it, hot mess or magic it all comes together in the end.
magicalmess 