As little Billie Shakespeare so eloquently wrote, “All the world’s a stage, and men and women merely players.” In Portland, Oregon that can be translated to “Keep Portland Weird.”
The stage here in the City of Roses certainly coughs up many, many unique (and I use that term kindly) characters. Take for instance the Unipiper who rides around on a unicycle, playing flaming bagpipes and dressed as a kilted Darth Vader. (Yes, you read that sentence correctly.) Then there’s Starr, the pigeon whispering poet. (Again, correct as written.) He spends his days talking to and kissing pigeons. (There are worse hobbies, I guess.) These folk aspire to fame, no matter how fleeting or small. But, it’s the everyday people going about their everyday lives that stand out to me.
Take for instance a patient I had a couple of years ago. As I rounded the corner to the waiting room and called out his name, up stood a fairly tall, thirty year old man with bright pink hair gelled straight up, a kilt made out of what appeared to be Carhartt fabric, and a “My Little Pony ” t-shirt. The outfit was completed with heavy wool knee-high socks and hiking boots.
Our exchange was oh so normal and as I exited the room I noticed he was being very modest in crossing his legs. Before my provider went in, I informed him of the hair and kilt. I left the “My Little Pony” t-shirt as a surprise. (Cause sometimes I just like to mess with him.)
On another occasion, I went again to the waiting room to fetch a patient and this time a young man stood up who was dressed exactly like the Lucky Charms Leprechaun. I kid you not. It was awesome. He had everything right down to the shoes. The only thing he lacked was the little four leaf clover sticking out of his hat. I was a little let down he didn’t have an Irish accent, but one can’t have everything.
The girl who showed up dressed like she was going to the Royal Wedding complete with feather fascinator was a particular favorite. I never know whether to comment on people’s chosen attire so I just keep my thoughts to myself. Fortunately she shared with me she was celebrating the marriage of William and Kate in her own way. Dandy, go for it.
I’ve come across a man wearing the most unusual pair of shoes. They were fashioned to look like goats hooves and he teetered on the actual hoof part expertly. I don’t know where else to go with this one.
The list goes on and on because apparently in Portland one’s everyday clothing is interchangeable with one’s costumes. I am fascinated by the fact these people acted normal and did not try to re-create a part based on their chosen fashion. I kind of love that. I wish I had the nerve to appear in public dressed in a medieval creation with a pointed hat trailing a long scarf. Or maybe a hoop skirt. No, I wouldn’t be able to get in the car. Maybe something with a bustle, although again, the car issue. I know, a 1920’s flapper dress with fringe a-flying, pearls looped generously around my neck and a feather boa. I think I would get a lot more out of my patients if I donned this outfit.
But, maybe I’m past my prime of getting away with this. Youth has a way of making eccentric dress seem daring, individual, creative. When one is past 60, it just looks like you’re an old nut, trying to recapture some forgotten dream. On the other hand, who cares? Certainly not Portland, Oregon.
magicalmess 